The problems begin when we forget that we’re just pretending, and come to believe we really are these miserable wretches complaining constantly about the price of lox, and the pesidential candidates, and carbon footprints. When in fact, that’s not at all who we are. It says it right there in Genesis. Remember?

 

“...God breathed the breath of life into his nostrils, and Man became a living soul.” He didn’t become a living body. He didn’t become a living libido. He became a living soul.

 

And for all you scientific types, answer me this. What’s the difference between a dead body and a living man? Breath. All the bodies that are breathing are alive. All the dead bodies are not breathing.

 

So there you have it. Who am I? Why, I’m the breath of life, slipped into yet another feeble human carcass, good for hundred or so years at which time I’ll bid farewell, soon to be forgotten by all but a few mysterious misfits who read obscure eastern texts and take note of the sayings of gurus.

 

And so to all of you who believe in God even though he is invisible and makes no noise, and all of you who don’t believe in God because he is invisible and doesn’t make any noise, I ask you once again,

 

“Who are you?” Correct. You are God’s breath, entering with each inhale, a human body of your choosing. Or an ass, for that matter. Or even a daffodil or a communist.